What we are made to feel is that we are all under pressure. We are also told that we are required to pursue our dreams or accomplish great things. Even in a Sunday sermon, they can tell us to find our quest. However, not all of these have been discovered by some of us.
And the dangerous thing is this pressure to follow your dreams. Because it allows us to concentrate on the false things most of the time. It demonstrates that aim is something we can show the world as evidence that we are successful – something that is to some extent stayed on the social media platform.
Well, what helps you prevent your stress is this summary. Because the real aim isn’t about what you do. Moreover, it’s not about demonstrating anything to the world. It’s more about discovering who you are.
Chapter 1 – Something never truly solves them is dealing with the issues on the surface; by you, it must be going deeper.
By writer Jordan Lee Dooley, she’s been suffering from acne since adolescence – terrifying acne. She found this embarrassing as a thirteen-year-old trying to influence a cute boy in the classroom. As an adult, when she did a job that demanded sitting in front of the camera for a specific amount of time, by her, it was seen as a real problem.
It got to the location where there were deep, painful cracks deep in the skin. By her, going to the doctor was resisted because of her frequent embarrassment. Using makeup was started due to cover up the flaws in her look by her. However, when she eventually went to the doctor, it was told with honesty that went beyond skincare issues by the doctor.
She was told by Jordan’s doctor that venturing to cover up the acne problem with makeup likely made the situation worse. Even though the reason for this problem was something deeper like stress or diet, makeup was not assisting.
There is an inference for us all. By you, has it ever felt the desire to cover up your imperfections? Perhaps you have thought that leaving your imperfections at the exhibit would be worse than long-term damage to cover them up.
As you see, hiding things on the surface just holds your mistrusts hidden, stays longer, and does more and more harm. Just like that pimple.
It has to be courageous enough by all of us to face the complete truth of who we are. Because your goal begins entirely from you. You are not the one whose bad parts are covered; you are the real, raw one.
So, there is a difficulty from the depths that will help you create real confidence in yourself. Promise to stop criticizing yourself for thirty days. Don’t describe yourself as fat. Do not recognize your imperfections in every photo you take. Connect your life to this basic rule: If you’re not going to say anything to your friend, don’t say about yourself. If your best friend got completely bombed while trying to joke at dinner, would you tell her was odd and should give up? No! For this reason, don’t tell this kind of thing to yourself.
Quit being obsessed with how you look outside. Hug your all, actual self. Because that’s where the goal begins.
Chapter 2 – The thing that is important for a significant vita is to get out of your comfort zone.
Have you ever sensed like others are not what you think? If anyone finds what’s really happening behind the scenes, will they think you are a complete fraud? Fraud syndrome is named for this anxiety and the person who has struggled with it all her adult life is Jordan.
Just the thing, that is the result of trying something, is her career. As a college student, an Etsy store was begun by her as a selling point for her crafting. When sales started, an online following was built by her with the help of posting life lessons and advice on social media. Anon, some of her Facebook posts were shared thousands of times. But even that time she worried. She rarely shared photos of herself in photos out of concern that if her followers find out how young and inexperienced she is, they will abandon her.
The Jorden’s cue from her career is that; if you give in to dishonesty syndrome and are not keen to try something, you will never be able to fully fulfill your aim in life.
However, the question is that; how are you able to leave this comfort zone?
First of all, quit being so nervous about expectations. An interview was held by Jordan for a corporate internship while she was a student. This was a glorious chance – a stepping stone to the significant corporate career she had always been waiting to build. But the fact is, she couldn’t feel completely inspired after her interview. She didn’t desire the job! When she spoke to her mother, she expected her mother to be told that she should continue to concentrate and give her a chance. However, instead, her mother said, “Then please don’t!” Said. Most of the time, by us, things are done because we expect ourselves or because we assume others expect us. Well, don’t permit your expectations to be prevented from discovering your real aim.
Secondly, to make leaving from your comfort zone simpler, you should take little steps. By Jordan, a five-year business plan wasn’t prepared when she started the Etsy store. If everything beforehand was tried to understand by her, she could never have proceeded. Instead, she took tiny steps – she figured out about Etsy, went to the Hobby Lobby, bought some paint and canvases, and made the initial sale.
You don’t need to do everything at the beginning to start in life. By you, only taking a small step can be done to begin.
Chapter 3 – Although frustration is difficult, at the same time, it can be also a strong and affirmative force.
Jordan’s college sweetheart and later husband was a football star. By Matt, an NFL career was dreamed of, he worked amazingly hard for it and it looked like he would be captured by a team. By the couple, their future life was planned around this exciting chance. And when draft day came, Matt, Jordan, friends, and family assembled to await calls from multiple teams.
It is time, but the calls did not show up. Five minutes, fifteen minutes, forty-five minutes later the phone was still quiet. It wasn’t supposed to be. That night, it was tried by the young couple to face the sharp frustration of their shattered dreams. It was the beginning of several years of uncertainty about the shape of their life. But those years, though frustrating, were full of lessons on what created not only a comfy life but also a meaningful life.
Changing your mind is a significant lesson. Of course, because of the failure in his NFL career, Matt felt disappointed. Over time, however, by the couple, it was discovered to stop saying things “don’t work out”. Because they did. Their lives were working as they should, even if they didn’t realize it at the moment. Sure, handle your frustration. But don’t roll in it.
Realizing that frustration opens up novel chances is another lesson. Looking back, Jordan was happy that she and her husband didn’t get what they desired in the early years of their marriage. If their plans had gone well, they might not have been able to go back to Matt’s hometown and spend the last months of Matt’s father’s life with him. If the cut had been made by Matt, perhaps her book wouldn’t have been written by Jordan. If they hadn’t been disappointed in that season of life, they might never have found the future riches next season.
Once, by Jordan, a text message that shook her deeply was received. The message said that “the lessons that are learned the hardest are the most important ones.” It was the most real thing she had heard in a long time. Even if frustration is not simple, this is something we can all find out.
Chapter 4 – The pressure on your life can be diminished by preventing frequent comparisons.
So, when you surf on social media, view your friends show off and celebrate milestones. And you begin to wonder, why don’t I start a creative side hustle? Why am I not at a sparky party around by hundreds of friends? What am I producing in my life?
A pressure caused by comparison causes this feeling, the feeling of insecurity and anxiety that strikes us when we see others who appear to have solved everything. Often we are drawn to comparing ourselves – our appearance, our status, or our achievement- with the people around us. By Jordan, this is always done to her. In the gym, she emphasizes that the only treadmill available is between two full treadmills, and she realizes herself as she looks at her neighbor’s speed. Is it only 6.8 miles per hour? Passable, she considers, runs away until she realizes that his neighbor has risen to 7.5 without sweating.
And indeed, being defeated to the pressure caused by the comparison is like running on a treadmill. You ask why? Because when we have a comparison situation, we are continuously trying to run faster than other human beings, but we never actually get to a place of value.
Therefore, try to prevent comparing and examining yourself with others. One note that can assist is to concentrate on your Cause. Why are you running on the treadmill? Why are you found in the gym for the competition? No! You are going there because of staying healthy or reaching your purpose. Why are you building a business? Making of a show on Instagram? Or to earn a living for your family and make a difference in the world? If you realize yourself drifting towards comparison, don’t forget that Why is it an excellent way to refocus on your true purpose?
Replacing your jealousy with happiness is another way to prevent comparing yourself with others. As long as Jordan grew older and began to struggle with the comparative tendency, it was decided to pair any jealous thoughts with two positive, cheerful thoughts by her – either about the purpose of her comparison or about herself. Try to love whom you are right now, while at the same time being influenced by her success by thinking deadly thoughts about the runner next to you.
When you get rid of the habit of continually comparing yourself to others, you will take a lot of pressure on your life. However, a comparison is not the only thing that hinders our real aim. Let’s think about the distraction.
Chapter 5 – It is overcoming distractions that will help you live a purposeful life.
Since we live in the Information Age, there seems to be an infinite number of chances at our disposal. You can open an Etsy store in your garage. Or apply to master degree school from home. With just a little bit of effort and the push of a button, you can do nearly everything that interests you. But in fact, one of the biggest obstacles to living a purposeful life is these overwhelming number of opportunities because making the right decisions can be made much more difficult because of it.
How do you know what you’re trying to accomplish on Earth as you have millions of choices and such easy, compelling distractions?
So, how can we escape from going off-road? To recognize your most general distractions is the first step, it means that things you can’t resist at the end of a terrifying day like surfing on social media in search of entertainment, or maybe some easy self-likes in the form of likes.
Leading us to a passive life is the problem with these supposed distractions. The more distracted we are, we become more passive and purposeful. So, get to know yourself. Find out what distractions you fall into when life gets a little difficult or you keep delaying a difficult decision.
The second step is to adopt the 10-10-10 rule, a concept improved by writer Suzy Welch. This rule provides you to make excellent decisions, so it describes going beyond ordinary. The idea is easy. When you need to decide what to spend time on, think about the consequences of your selection – in ten minutes, ten weeks, and ten years.
Abruptly, the distraction short-period selection becomes less attractive. Certainly, while giving your kid candy will make the next ten minutes more constant, but in ten weeks? Things look diverse now.
So, when the next time you turn to Netflix rather than completing this challenging but prizing project, check yourself out. Follow the 10-10-10 rule. When you do this, you will find that your distraction is keeping you from a life rich in what you are doing.
Chapter 6 – Describe again achievement based on who you truly are.
Have you ever felt pressured to achieve? When you seldom see #GirlBoss or other inspirational social media posts, do you experience some kind of weird mix of sensations like feeling inspired and bored at the same time?
If so, you are not alone. Countless young women were met by Jordan on campuses and conferences all over the United States as a result of her profession and profile. And in communications, a general theme reveals the pressure to achieve; the pressure to be their absolute best version.
The truth is, a real accomplishment in an aimful life isn’t about sharing selfies from your excellent job or managing multi-million-dollar companies or patronizing like a rock star. All about living this way is a success, and by God, you were created as an individual. And this means that the tired mother is hopeless to take a break or the stressed student who has trouble keeping up is just as thriving as the flies. Why? The reason is that they show up each day for their lives. Although by these women, there is not necessary to prove anything to the outside world, they do their best.
By you, this can be done in a very practical way by setting daily targets that designate what the true achievement in your life truly is. Grow first. What was put in your heart, by God? What do you dream of accomplishing in life? Then consider little. What are the things that contribute to a flourishing day?
If you require inspiration, Jordan’s daily targets involve pursuing: avoid her phone and spend quality time with her husband after 6 pm., and move your body for half an hour. Lead time to chat with God. And write a thousand sentences.
This is one way to determine and maintain the kind of success associated with reaching meaning and aim every day. A better way to live. The woman who takes her worth from her status or wealth, or from what others think of her, is a slave to the pressure to maintain her. Only by the woman who is redefining her success can concentrate on what matters. And isn’t that what is desired by all of us?
Own Your Everyday: Overcome the Pressure to Prove and Show Up for What You’re Made to Do by Jordan Lee Dooley Book Review
It is the modern world that is whole of pressures – from the continuous distraction to the allure of comparison, to the feeling that everyone else’s life is arranged. However, when you concentrate on the real aim and living your best life, then a satisfying life can be discovered by you – right here, right now.
A healthy society should be found by you.
The people around us are the biggest source of pressure and stress in our lives. So, check your surroundings. Do you approve of life? Or is it an endless cycle of comparisons and demonstrations yourself? If you select the second one, so, try to create deeper friendships with people who desire the best for you.